Read any books about the differences between men and women (think Men are From Mars, Women are From Venus) and you are likely to discover that the sexes typically communicate in different ways. Women, for example, are more inclined to process information through verbal exchange. They talk with friends. They speak more openly about their feelings.
Men, on the other hand, are problem-solvers. Men are far more likely to offer solutions when a woman discusses a problem. Men like to offer ideas. But women, typically, don't want answers so much as they want a listening and sympathetic ear.
When a woman wants to talk about breast cancer, men can be most helpful by listening. We don't have to jump to conclusions, try to solve the problem, or make a decision. We need to listen.
The art of listening can often press us, however. Listening is much more than simply hearing what is being said. Listening is also affirming, sitting in silence, or providing good eye contact. If a woman knows that she is being heard, this is most important.
The art of listening is also the art of empathy. We may not be able to sit in the same place, but we can affirm that we understand the feelings and that we are supportive of a choice. If there is indecision and anxiety to process, it is important that we affirm these realities, too.
The art of listening is being there. Men may not be hard-wired in the same ways as women, but we can be a strong presence. We can be good listeners.
Men, on the other hand, are problem-solvers. Men are far more likely to offer solutions when a woman discusses a problem. Men like to offer ideas. But women, typically, don't want answers so much as they want a listening and sympathetic ear.
When a woman wants to talk about breast cancer, men can be most helpful by listening. We don't have to jump to conclusions, try to solve the problem, or make a decision. We need to listen.
The art of listening can often press us, however. Listening is much more than simply hearing what is being said. Listening is also affirming, sitting in silence, or providing good eye contact. If a woman knows that she is being heard, this is most important.
The art of listening is also the art of empathy. We may not be able to sit in the same place, but we can affirm that we understand the feelings and that we are supportive of a choice. If there is indecision and anxiety to process, it is important that we affirm these realities, too.
The art of listening is being there. Men may not be hard-wired in the same ways as women, but we can be a strong presence. We can be good listeners.
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